wait a second.

a lot has changed in the past few months.

- because of the hiring freeze in CA and the government, i can't get a "real" job using my criminology, law & society degree. instead, i got a job after being recruited by ex-managers at the closet to be a manager at yet another retail store and handle my own gang of retail slaves. but i'm getting paid enough to not complain.
- i learned a lot about american apparel's present policies and am so glad i left that vortex of social doom. after i left, they began taking what they called "class photos" and critiqued every retail employee's "look". then they started firing people who didn't fit the "image", which was their way of deciding who was "unattractive". i'm fairly certain that is also known as "discrimination" and "illegal".
- gary and i hit our one year mark, which was a first for the both of us. then someone started a rumor that we got married.
- i finally joined the world of BBM, and it is incredible.
- the CHP decided to ruin my perfect driving record and give me my first speeding ticket, as some dickhead weaved in and out of traffic going full speed ahead got away.

i can't remember what else i was going to say. it's 3:30 AM.

what to do, what to do?

my post-grad life consists of the same routine every day, and it has yet to include a paying job. it's getting trying, and it's hard for me to figure out how i'm supposed to be and stay happy when i'm broker than broke. not to mention i was lied to/flaked out on/who knows? by a possible job that sounded like a done deal. seems like the pattern when it comes to me and work opportunities.

but other than that, life is wonderful!

class of 2009

i graduated!
i'm done!
i'm unemployed!

...and there goes the excitement.

if i could...

i would:

- read every post on the Sartorialist starting from the beginning (assuming i can also pause time)
- sit still and read up on interior design
- magically find related blogs to interest me day in and day out
- learn how to make awesome meals every night so gary stops eating crap
- ... or push him to revisit trader joe's and bring back dinner dates!
- be creative, all day, everyday.

for now, i live a simple life.

i graduate in 10 days, 14 hours and some odd minutes and seconds. i sleep in till noon (sometimes later), go to an internship that is quickly coming to an end, and then to my second home. sometimes we bbq, sometimes we play video games (since his xbox is broken, lots of attention has been turned to my wii). sometimes we explore, sometimes we watch a lot of food network (now that LOST is over for the season). not to mention sports. lots and lots of sports. then it's off to my first home and get ready for another day.

soon, reality is gonna hit me in the face like i just did with the remote control (that one was a "f$&k!" + a tearjerker) and i'm gonna appreciate this domestic life SO MUCH. aside from our weekly visits to tantalum with his friends and my crazy nights with my friends without him (when he's DJing), it's so, so nice. who am i kidding? it's just nice all around.

conclusion: i'm so happy right now!

wait, did that tie into the intro? (research paper humor... sorry.)

legit

on a beautiful saturday most people would be spending chillin out, riding their bikes or waking up at noon and going out to eat, me and maybe 15 other people took a day trip to palm desert to shoot handguns/(sniper) rifles/shotguns and needless to say, blew shit sky high (and the side of a mountain).

watch facebook for pictures.

good. ness.

it's been a while

- the pain and tears were worth it! i got an A on my research paper (50 pg portfolio) and no Cs (as i feared for months - it was a tough quarter)
- went to vegas for nuwan's 21st, stayed at the palm's, tried not to kill alex every so often, saw felix da housecat, and can live without going back for a while
- my laptop's 7 and U keys popped off and my A key sticks
- christmas went by so fast but it felt like preparations took forever
- amy's "yearbook" of photos and the christmas card gary gave me (and daisy black... and the jewelry...) were among my favorite gifts. despite trying not to cry, i still did (and do) every time i read it. coming from a man of few words, it means the world to me.
- i've disappeared from everything social. aside from going out to the occasional UFC party or the prospector or tantalum, all i ever want to do is stay in and watch iron chef, top chef et al., but i'm still restless, which is weird.
- gary's car got broken into, had his wallet (that i gave him two days prior) and gps stolen, and $1200 worth of damages run up on the personal and business cards in less than 10 hrs. and what does he say? "eh... it's done, i'm handling it" while i'm all sorts of a stress case.
- NYE in san diego is in 1.5 days and dj gary is gonna tear the place down!

being practically unemployed sucks but what can you do? worry about it later!

i'm finally 21!

thursday: thanksgiving = hilarious...ly tasty
friday: detroit bar = crazy/drunken/haze
saturday: habana + tentation = mellow + entertaining
sunday: lazy sunday in LB + LAX hollywood = the best day all weekend

details later, maybe.

bottom line:
love family
love friends
love love

edit: and a lil somethin' somethin' alex found on the 'net.

21

in about 24 hours, i'll be on my way to toasting to my 21st. i never thought i'd have to put this much planning and effort into something that would fall through at the whim of some LA club promoters, but here i am. maybe i should try my hand at being a planner...

friday: detroit bar in costa mesa
saturday: tentation in newport
sunday: LAX in LA

happy thanksgiving!

it's on.

senior year sucks

i can't write to save my life.

i honestly think if gary and amy weren't texting me periodically to see if i was still alive, i wouldn't feel the obligation to be so i could reply. because...

this research paper is killing me. i've been sitting here for four hours, trying to get my words out, and it's as if i never started in the first place. it's taken me so much to force myself to focus, and yet nothing is being produced. i have all the research done, i have the themes, i have an idea of what i need to write, and yet... nothing. it doesn't help that i'm starving but can't leave because I'VE GOT NOTHING DONE. but at least now i know if the words won't come, the tears will. which goes along with my last post about being human after all!

human after all

- severe case of senioritis
- so much love in my life
- twilight midnight premiere on thursday
- thanksgiving in 9 days
- 10.5 days till i'm 21 (you'll be hearing from me)
- a month till winter break (crossing my fingers for holiday travels with gary and the girls)
- a month and a week till christmas
- a month and a half till new year's (everyone come to san diego!) and new possibilities

my head is going to explode.